Working in urban education, I see it all the time: kids who believe that their fate lies in my hands and not their own. The grade they receive seems determined by my pleasure, be it an A or an F. I have rarely heard a student say, “I earned an A”; generally they tell me that I basically gave them a grade like a gift. “Mrs. Spencer, thank you for this A.”
I know people like this outside my classroom as well. These people never “make it” because someone is holding them down. It is always someone else’s fault why they do not have what they need, always a reason why nothing ever works out. The reason rarely reflects the one thing they can do something about: themselves.
I am a firm believer in self agency. I can do anything I set my mind to. I may need help, and I most certainly won’t always be THE best. I will TOTALLY run into opposition. But I can always do MY best. I can do whatever I want. Be whomever I want. I have never understood those who willingly give up every ounce of control to outside forces and fate. Even at my lowest moments, I knew that if I really wanted the situation to change, I could do something differently to make it so.
Greatness stands just outside the door of I CAN. As long as you keep saying, I CAN’T–as long as you keep saying, I CAN’T BECAUSE–you will never open the door to greatness. Every excuse becomes an extra lock on the door to greatness,until it becomes easier and simpler to stay locked in the room of mediocrity.
But if you tell yourself that you CAN, then eventually you will–no matter what other people may have to say.
God bless! Start saying you can and you will.