So, we are lying in bed and my husband shares his excitement for this video of a woman ministering to other women about the spirit of rejection and learning self worth and what not.
And I’m irked.
Not (mind you) because of what she’s saying or whatever because I’d already watched the video and cosigned on every word, okay? No, I was tilted in my mind because a) I been saying what she was saying for like 2-3 years now and b) why in the sam hill heck does this man never listen to or read a word I say? If I have nothing else, I have God’s wisdom. I asked for it and God keeps delivering.
As that question danced before my eyes and my flesh got ready to catch an attitude for being yet again ignored and overlooked by the person closest to me other than God and my mama, The Holy Spirit did what The Holy Spirit does to me all. the. time. Dropped a whole scripture in my head.
So I looked it up. Googled it, in fact, because I suck at bible addresses. And this what it said:
“But Jesus said to them, A prophet is not without honor (deference, reverence) except in his [own] country and among [his] relatives and in his [own] house.”
Mark 6:4 AMPC
And of course, I’m like, “Okay! I see.”
And I did–I do!
This isn’t really just about my little story. This is first a warning shot to every believer about how hard it is to help those with whom you share a deep and complex history.
It is also a question about what often happens next when a family is split about salvation and belief. Too many ministries in the black community shame the membership because family doesn’t show up and fill up the pews. But be honest–how many of your family members actually let you live anything down? These folks have seen you at your worst. How do you get your dad saved? Your mom? Your siblings? Your cousins? Your spouse?
What do you do when you are without honor in your own house?
Figure out what little you can do and do that. Jesus was a little surprised but He kept it moving. He healed who he could and left it alone. Just showing consistent change may be all that you can do. That and prayer that God sends help. Neither of these require participation from or expectations for your loved ones.
Enlist others to assist. Right after that, Jesus sent all the disciples out on their first mission trips. I do not believe the two events to be unrelated. Even though you know your families’ stories, you may not empathize with them in the way that they need to get right. Someone else –with the same message, softer tone, no strings attached, no emotional load–might be able to get to the corners of your sister’s heart in a way that you never will.
Minister to those who will receive. Jesus told the missionaries that He sent out to “shake the dust” if folks weren’t listening, probably thinking about what He had just encountered. It’s truly sage advice that I really work on adhering to as much as possible. Some folks won’t hear you no matter what wonders and miracles you’ve performed. They will deliberately smush you back into the box of who you used to be so that they can avoid truth. Let them alone. There are others–sometimes not of your own tribe (like the Centurian and the lady at the well or the woman Jesus basically called a dog)–who need your message.
I can say that once I got over my loved ones not receiving my message, the folks who need it came out of nowhere. And, my honor continues to come from God even as God has rerouted that honor around folks in my life.
Be blessed and be bold–your message will be received by those meant to receive it.