Love is not easily provoked. I’m in trouble, y’all.

Love is not easily provoked.

Hmph.

I don’t really have to go much further, because I own houses over there in that neighborhood. I stay battling offense. Which then (of course) leads me to the record keeping that I am not supposed to do.

Yeah, I think that the spirit of offense was assigned to me at birth, the demob child of the spirit of rejection that has plagued me my whole life from my original dad walking away. I have perfected the art of the preemptive strike, of protecting myself from real harm by acting on the perceived slights that flittered about me. How many people have actually harmed me? Not many. I have not given many people the chance. I assume they finna offend me so I just get a jump on it. I be having a WHOLE attitude.

Ha! D’ya know that the spirit of offense is the mother of “having an attitude”. An “attitude” as we mean it in the black household is about how you present yourself, how you interact. Your openness or lack thereof. Folks who have an “attitude” are hard to talk to, hard to share with. Every interaction is colored with their faulty perception that you trying to get one off at their expense. So a person with an attitude is always looking to fight about the possibility of you harming them.

People who have an attitude never believe in good intentions.

After pushing me down in 2018, God has said ENOUGH to me, basically saying, No more of this bad feeling; no more of walking around here lying to folks about how much you love love them and you’ont e’em know whatchu saying. I haven’t even covered all of the things love is yet, but each one has convicted my very soul. And I am starting to get it–I am Love’s representative on earth and I am the worst kind of ambassador. I am the Donald Trump of the kingdom of God, outchea all willy-nilly and unprepared.

God’s preparing me for greater. Which means I have to be open to His spirit and also to other people. Which means this attitude must die.

Still sitting.

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